A Noel Guthrie Acrylic on canvas

A Noel Guthrie Acrylic on canvas
The Cockabully Hunters --- from an original painting by Noel Guthrie

Thursday, 10 November 2011

Well, I'll be dog-goned

I've just got to tell this little story.
Now, about a year ago I went into the local Council Office to re register the dog.  Over the last five or six years the Council has a applied a discount if the dog was neuted.  Well, how was I to know they had ceased this practice.  Anyway, I was told when I fronted up to the desk, "Oh no," she said, "we will have to send an inspector to inspect your property."
"What for," I asked.
"To see if your property is suitable," she smiled at me, like a great white cruising around in every decreasing circles.
"So what do I do now?"  Dumbfounded I just looked blank, well that's par for the course for me anyway.
"Well," she said, still smiling, "you will have to pay the full price, and we can adjust it later." Yeah! Right!
Now, about a eight or nine months pass when this blond with an international accent arrived at the gate.  She stepped out of this $60,000 utility, donned her coat and gumboots, the sun was shining, but she'd obviously spotted a black cloud over our section.  She knocked on the door, saying she had come to see if our section was suitable for our dog.
"Mmmm," she said looking around the place, "you will have to put a high gate between the garage and the house and fit a padlock, you will also have to fit a padlock on the side gate, otherwise everything is fine."
I could see what the wife was thinking, our dog is bright, but unlocking a padlock that high up?  The damn thing is no higher off the ground than a grasshoppers rectum!!
"Is all this because we asked for a discount for our nueted dog," grumbled the wife.
"Yep, it's in the book," and she started to thumb through a thick wad of papers.
"If we don't bother with the discount," says the wife, by this time, sparks were shooting off the loose ends of her hair, "what happens then?"
"Oh, that is different," the dog lady says, "everything is fine, you don't have to anything."
Boom!  "Well, stuff your discount," yelled the wife, and slammed the door.
I have never stopped laughing since, they say blonds are more fun, they say lots of other things as well.
If that experience is anything to go by, many of those comments could well be true.

Have a nice day, and don't stand in a dog turd on the way home?

Noel Guthrie

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